Thanks giving Day 18

Today I am thankful that sane heads prevailed in the world, and that I awoke to this:

johnny-depp

rather than the cover proclaiming that Robert Pattinson  won. (It turned out that cover was faked. Do no news agencies fact check any more?)

I’m not going into any anti-Twilight rant or anything, I just have this observation to make.  Somehow we went from

Kiefer_Sutherland_Biographymmmmm, Kiefer., (Lost Boys was my first vampire movie and turned me into a fan for life)

and

500012978_d7891e1e-78cb-420d-8194-1384eb34880c-000David Bowie, truly one of the sexiest men alive, (seen here in The Hunger, one of the oddest vampire movies ever made)

and

Interview-with-the-Vampire-brad-pitt-2855886-377-298Brad Pitt, who is just SO pretty,  and fantasticly cast as Louis in Interview with the Vampire- much better casting than Tom Cruise as Lestat, who should only ever be played by:

stuart townsendStuart Townsend, who was PERFECT. And also, so so gorgeous,

and

interview-with-the-vampire-armand

Antonio Banderas, who while he looked completely wrong as Armand, who was supposed to be a cherubic blond, is insanely good looking,

and

Angel-poster-si-01

S618_Spike

David Boreanaz and James Marsters from Buffy, who are also, “rilly, rilly good looking”, ala Zoolander

to

Robert-Pattinson-wenn.0.0.0x0.398x640

a guy who on a good day  resembles Frankenstein, and on an off day shows up at actual events looking like this:

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Seriously, what are we teaching the young women of America? Vampires are supposed to epitomize all that is gorgeous and sexy and dangerously attractive in the world.  Robert Pattinson does … not.

So today, I am apparently thankful for good looking men playing vampires in movies; for Johnny Depp, who has not played a vampire, but should; for Bruce who reminded me about David Bowie (seriously, how did I forget that?); and for the internets for providing me with pictoral evidence for my thesis today.

AND for the universe at large, which is apparently listening to me, because it seems that Tim Burton is going to make a film version of Dark Shadows, with … Johnny Depp as Barnabas Collins. I might die.

4 thoughts on “Thanks giving Day 18

  1. OMG, are you frackin’ serious?! I heart Dark Shadows, I heart Barnabas Collins, I heart the universe (and you…)

  2. I can totally see Johnny Depp as Barnabas Collins! I started watching Dark Shadows with my Grandma Annie when I was three years old! She taught me to crochet on my fingers while we watched that and General Hospital every day. She always had a banana for me too! I get to scared to watch Vampire movies now though. I love Kiefer but have never seen that movie bz it would haunt me. Quentin Collins though needs to be somebody absolutely gorgeous like Antonio but without the accent. Angelique needs to be an uncommon beauty too. I may have to see this movie if it doesn’t turn out too dark. I saw Twilight but wasn’t impressed at all. Kaje’ calls the books “Mormon porn,” lol! Brianna and Jill love the books though. Maybe I’m just too old to get it!

    Oh, come over to my blog and click on the link to Camille’s blog. She has a video done about Elder Uchtdorf’s conference talk that is just the best!

  3. Carolyn on

    Just for perspective, movie vampires haven’t always been hotties. I’m totally clueless about movies. But maybe Pattison was the best-looking guy with really unnerving eyes who showed up for casting. He does have sort of a brooding, “you’ll never be able to get close to me” vibe going on. A danger signal for girls in real life who think they’ll be able to “change him”.

    And it’s been a long time since teen idols had to be gorgeous and sexy and dangerously attractive. Sometimes “dangerous” has been enough. See Numbers 1 and 2.

    Maybe a little more gorgeous and sexy wouldn’t be a bad thing.

  4. Cousin Kim on

    I am glad you kept that bit about Dark Shadows till the very end or I would have died earlier and missed the rest of your post. Life might be good again. The Twilight series was a fiasco from the beginning. Nobody was cast right.

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